I just turned 30 this last week. Where has the time gone? I once felt so ahead of the game, starting my professional career straight out of college. Now I feel behind the ball, wishing I was further along on this path I’ve chosen. What has changed?
Well, for starters, I have. My understanding of the world and consequently the way I see it has evolved much over the last 10 years. I went from a college kid with lofty goals of saving people and making a different to a police officer arresting the same people, for the same things, over and over and over again.
Then I decided it was time for a change, a new challenge, and new adventure. It certainly has been an adventure, although I could have used more excitement and much less stress. The last few years have been full of risks with few rewards obvious rewards. Leaving a good paying career with great benefits for the unstable construction finance industry; leaving that well-paying yet unsatisfying career for a noble and ambitious cause (Police Academy); working hard to learn a new skill set and produce content with no financial return and discouraging growth rates. Why would I follow this seemingly foolish path?
I am no longer ok with living a “safe” life, like everything depends on me retiring comfortably and being financially secure. The cost of such a strategy is far too high for me. Living a life at half tilt, turning down opportunities to do things that matter, always wondering what would have or could have been. No thank you!
Pursuing a dream and following your passion doesn’t come without costs though. Just six months into Police Academy’s existence, I’m tired. I’ve doubted this path so many times I can’t begin to count. I know I began this for a reason, but there comes a point where it’s time to pay the piper and get out, to be smart and quit something that isn’t meant to be. Failure is not something to be feared, it's something to learn from. I'm ok with cutting my losses and moving on.
I’m not saying it’s that time for me, not yet. I do still believe in the mission of Police Academy. I knew this would take time, that “the dip” would be long and difficult to traverse. I just hope I’m working smart and hard, not just hard. I hate sweating over things that just need a different angle or a quick sharpening of the axe.
So I guess that is where I’m at (realizing it as I write). I need to step back, look at where this thing started, where it’s going and what I need to do now. The content is out there and I think it’s something people are looking for, yet few (relatively speaking) have found. That is the challenge and one, quite frankly, I don’t feel prepared for. A new challenge, a new adventure, a new decade. Let's do this!
Do Good || Be Strong || Fear Nothing